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‘Keep your friends close and your enemies closer’

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By: Dr. Satyawan Saurabh

If we categorize the people around us outside the family ties then they can be classified into four categories. Friend, Enemy, Unknown, and Commander. In these four categories, friends and enemies play a huge role in molding our character, personality, behavior, etc. Everyone living on this holy planet deals with these two types of people, friends, and foes. There is no such rule that we should treat such people only. It depends on many factors like our past experiences, instincts… But, before you hate, like, or love… someone you must follow some rationality. Now, we’ll see what that rationality is, and how different people perceive it. Different people are different.

First, we will discuss our relationship with enemies, because even if we don’t like this man, this man indirectly helps us in many ways. In general, we deal with our enemies in three different ways. 1. We don’t let him in our circle and hate him to such an extent that we don’t even like to mention his name. 2. We maintain a relationship with him, though often not a very close relationship, 3. We maintain a very good relationship with him, thinking that one day he will restructure his mindset.

First things first, what happens if a person hates his enemy, and what are the consequences? This type of behavior is not going to get you anywhere and this type of mindset is going to benefit you. Let us take a good example to explain this. There are two guys named Tom and Harry in a school called DPS. Tom is the first ranker and Harry is an average student. Tom has a very good knowledge of the subject and at the same time, he doesn’t give proper respect to Harry and insults him for his low marks. If Harry hates him and avoids talking to him, then Harry’s not going to get anything out of it. Harry would be like that and Tom would be like that. We have a precedent in politics for this kind of behavior as well.

What do we get if we keep friendly relations with our enemies? We are going to get a lot of benefits, and we can improve our personalities. See how? We take the same example that we took earlier. In this case, Harry maintains a good relationship with Tom, although he is a bully. Because of this connection, Harry can talk to Tom and discuss difficult topics with him and clear most of his doubts. In this way, he can improve his subject and knowledge. Ultimately, we beat him in numbers as well. Here we can also take the example of Indo-Pak relations. Though Pakistan is firing from across the border, helping infiltration and becoming a sanctuary for terrorists, India is trying to maintain good relations with Pakistan. Similarly, China may be claiming parts of Arunachal Pradesh, but India maintains good relations with China. Because of this, we can see many good things like BRICS, AIIB, RCEP, and East Asia Summit. In politics too, it is good to have cordial relations with the opposite parties, even if their ideology is different.

Third, what if we blindly like him without any tabs? Mostly, you will be cheated. Let us take the same example, in this case, Harry likes Tom to the extent that he is not bullied by him. In this case, it is more likely for Tom to be misinformed and sidetracked when Harry asks him a doubt. After discussing this we can safely say that it is good to make relationships with your enemies. Now let us see what kind of relationship we should maintain with our friends. Generally, we maintain two types of relations with our friends. 1. Taking them for granted and trusting them blindly 2. We’ll like them, and believe them but have little insight into them.

What happens if we believe them blindly? Most of the time, one day or the other, your heart is hurt, battered, and betrayed. for a famous story. There is such an ashram in which the Guru is teaching his disciples about good and bad relations… Suddenly one of his disciples asked his Guru what is there in this universe that is poisonous? The Guru laughed and said that anything in excess is poisonous. If we trust someone blindly, there is a high chance that we will get cheated by him. Because He knows our weaknesses better than our enemies. In this, we can also take the example of Indo-Nepal relations. India helped Nepal, the small Himalayan state, in many ways, such as free transit, no borders, training its civil servants, etc. What happened? Nepal PM complains about India in the United

What if we get the slightest clue about our best friend? You will not trust him blindly and we will be a little careful while sharing your personal information. You will not get cheated easily. Even if you are betrayed, the damage to your heart will be less than in the first case. In this, we can take the example of the relations between America and India. Although we claim that America is India’s natural partner, we do not follow US policies in international fora and further, we try to protect our interests. That’s why we have to maintain a close relationship with our friends and not the “closest”.

A friend will always be with you and share his knowledge with you. In many cases, like-minded people will become friends, and often there will be no difference of opinion between them. If we take the enemy there will be more chances of having a different opinion and we can benefit from him also we can keep an eye on his activities if we have close relations. Yes, it is good for you to “keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”

The writer is a Research Scholar, Poet, Freelance Journalist & Columnist, All India Radio & TV Panellist.


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