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Home OPINION

Understanding Narcissism: The Various Forms of Deception

OPINION by OPINION
February 9, 2023
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Understanding Narcissism: The Various Forms of Deception
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                  Dr Rohi

Narcissists attempt to destroy your life with lies because they know theirs can be destroyed with the truth. Everyone nowadays is familiar with the term narcissism but its historical roots are less well known. In the Greek story of Narcissus, a lovely young man, renowned for his stunning looks, who discovered he couldn’t resist gazing at his reflection in a body of water one day. Until he eventually wilted and died, he persisted in being preoccupied with his own image. Thus, his name endures as a reference for extreme self-regard. This is where the word ‘narcissism’ originates. People with narcissistic tendenciesoverestimate their own importance. For example, many narcissists overestimate their self-confidence or sense of accomplishment. Others are totally preoccupied with how they look. Some people make efforts to increase their influence or power. The majority of narcissists believe that they are superior to others and are elite or exceptional. They consider themselves to be extremely important, regardless of their actual social standing, and they want others to feel the same way about them. They live on other people’s adulation and admiration. However, criticism from others can quickly demolish their haughtiness. When this happens, it frequently results in anger, rejection, or a barrage of insults. Narcissists are often considered as emotional vampires who desperately need to drain others to get admiration and attention, regardless of how bad their behaviour is.

Many people have subtle narcissistic traits in their personalities. It’s only natural to feel proud of yourself when you do something significant or to like yourself when you look good. Occasionally, those sentiments of pride may cause us to become a little more self-absorbed than usual. But having those feelings occasionally doesn’t make you a narcissist. True narcissists are defined by their narcissistic qualities, which rule their personality and way of life. Every element of their lives, including their work, friendships, and close connections, are impacted by the condition. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a complicated disorder, just like all other personality disorders. This has become a contentious issue, owing to widespread misunderstanding. It’s also been stigmatised as a personal choice, which it isn’t. Here an individual have an excessive sense of self importance. Individuals with this mental condition demand excessive amounts of attention and want to be admired. It’s possible for those who have this disorder to be incapable of comprehending or caring about the sentiments of others. However, beneath their outward display of excessive confidence, they actually lack confidence in their own abilities and are severely hurt by the least criticism. A weak, rigid, and irrational concept of self lies at the heart of Narcissistic Personalities. People with Narcissistic Personality Disorders need to think of themselves as extraordinary in order to sustain their fragile self-image. Many of the recurring patterns of behaviour they exhibit have this as their primary source.

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How Do People Develop Narcissistic Personality Disorders?

People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder do not have a single identified cause. In addition to early life events, it is also thought that genetics may be involved. Children who being over-valued, over praised, suffer from abuse, neglect, or trauma may be particularly vulnerable. A risk factor could also be having a narcissistic or highly critical parent. Whatever the reason, these kids grow up with a weak sense of self and a high need for praise from others. Additionally, a lot of narcissists have very poor self-esteem. They overstate their abilities or accomplishments as a result of these attributes. Additionally, they are continually looking for affirmation from other people. Comprehending narcissists in your life requires understanding this crucial aspect. Although they exhibit haughty and conceited conduct, their sentiments of inferiority are deeply ingrained.

How a Narcissist Brainwash you?

  • Cutting you off from your network of supporters.
  • Tricking you into perceiving things a certain way.
  • Using gas-lighting to make you question your own judgement.
  • Destroy your self esteem.
  • Dose you with occasional positive words or experiences.
  • Controlling you.
  • Degrading and demeaning you, then occasionally doing something positive in order to create a trauma bond.
  • Make you walk on egg shells out of fear of disapproval.

You are now brainwashed and under the control of a narcissist.

Narcissists are addicts. They are addicted to being significant. They are addicted to attention and constantly being validated and acknowledged. They live for narcissistic supply that is their drug.  A narcissist fabricates elaborate tales that are wholly false. One day the mask will come off, revealing the reality, and they’ll try to convince you otherwise by rejecting everything you’ve learnt (gas-lighting). They might even hold you accountable for what you are accusing them of doing (projection). You are now in trouble because of rumours that you shouldn’t have heard. They will go to great lengths to shield their life from lies, and manipulating you is a twisted game they play. They will spread false information about how unstable you are in order to turn your loved ones against you (the flying monkeys). They pull you back in as you move on (hovering). Don’t let this deceive you; it’s not real.

‘What are narcissists looking for, after all? Just someone at their level that they can feel superior to’. Luigina Sgarro

Author can be reached at rohi95jan@gmail.com.

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